


Compersion

by TheseusInTheMaze



Series: Metamours [3]
Category: Game Grumps
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Anxiety, Arguments, Compersion, Dates, Dry Orgasm, F/M, First Time, M/M, Miscommunication, Oral Sex, Poly Troubles, Polyamory, meandering dialogue
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-02
Updated: 2017-07-02
Packaged: 2018-11-22 10:32:20
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,113
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11378388
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheseusInTheMaze/pseuds/TheseusInTheMaze
Summary: Once the New Relationship Energy fades away, things in a relationship get more complicated.





	Compersion

**Author's Note:**

  * For [saiq2004](https://archiveofourown.org/users/saiq2004/gifts).



> Edited by the ever lovely Angel!

"You should kiss me," Arin said to Dan, his tone earnest, as the two of them sat on the Grump couch, absently fiddling with the character creation screen on their new game.

Why had they agreed to play this ridiculous game?

Regardless, they'd been fiddling for a while - apparently Dan had some kind of Great Vision of what he wanted the character to look like, and for once, he was actually putting his foot down. 

"Arin is just joking, Lovelies," Dan said quickly, and he laughed, a staccato, nervous sound, and he shot Arin a Look. 

"I'm never joking," Arin said, and he fluttered his eyelashes, teasing. "I am always at the utter _height_ of seriousness, and you know it." 

"Well," said Dan, "you're obviously not right now, if you're talking about kissing me."

"I'm utterly serious," said Arin. "I need you to lay a nice big wet one on me, right here, right now, in front of our... what, eight million viewers?"

Dan was still cackling, incredulous, and he was groping around on the table next to the couch. 

"You want a nice big, wet one?"

"The biggest, wettest one," Arin said.

Dan had put the controller down, and he was leaning forward, towards Arin, a shy smile on his face. 

Arin leaned forward as well, until they were almost kissing.

"Folks, Dan is just about to lay a big wet one on me," Arin said, in his best sportscaster voice. "Tune in for more - gah!" 

Something very cold and very wet was on Arin's crotch, dripping down his legs.

Dan was holding a now empty bottle of water, and he was beginning to laugh.

"I sure gave him a big wet one," said Dan, and now he was beginning to laugh, laughing so hard that he was flopping back against the couch, his face turning bright red, his chest rising and falling as he cackled. 

"You just poured a whole bottle of water on my lap," Arin said, as Dan picked up the controller again, still giggling. "You got me all wet!"

"You wanted a big wet one," Dan pointed out. "That one was pretty big and pretty wet!"

"Well, yeah, it was, but that was... mean," said Arin.

He was genuinely annoyed.

That wasn't how it went.

He made Dan squirmy, then they made up for it after the episode.

It wasn't Dan doing... well, stuff like that.

"Like you bugging me to kiss you isn't," said Dan, and he was still chuckling. "When you talk about how you need me in your ass and shit like that, it's _technically_ workplace sexual harassment."

"What about how you hit everyone on the butt?"

"I didn't say that I was exempt," said Dan, his own voice getting a bit defensive. "So what do you think? Blue hair and green eyes?"

"Sure," said Arin. "Also, you got water all over the couch!"

"It's just water," said Dan. "It'll dry out, no problem."

"If we get mold on it -"

"I'll get a new Grump couch," Dan said quickly. "It'll even be a comfortable couch, for a change."

"Are you dissing on my couch?"

Arin prodded Dan in the side.

"I'm just saying what everyone is thinking," said Dan, his tone teasing.

"Okay, but who is everyone? Like, all the Lovelies? Because I know the Lovelies don't know what our couch is like. And I'm sure there's, like, people sleeping on benches or something who'd be pretty fuckin' grateful for our couch."

"I know Holly was complaining about how hard the couch is," said Dan. "It _is_ pretty hard...."

"You know what else is hard?" Arin waggled his eyebrows, and he squeezed his dick through his wet pants. 

"There are rocks that are softer than this couch," said Dan. 

"I don't think the couch is that hard," said Arin. "It's nowhere near as hard as my dick." 

"Well, yeah, it's not that hard compared to you, considering the fact that you're a lot bigger than me," said Dan. "You sink down into it. I just kinda... perch on top of it."

"You just gotta gain more muscle, dude," said Arin, and he flexed. "I keep telling you, we're gonna get fuckin' jacked."

"If you make that a sex joke, I swear to - "

"But not as jacked as I'm gonna do to my penis later tonight," said Arin, and he was laughing now, full on laughing, leaning back against the back of the couch.

"Next time on Game Grumps," said Dan, "Arin is gonna get better jokes. Maybe something more mature, like fart jokes."

"I make the best fart jokes, and you know it," said Arin. 

"Yeah, but that's like... disco's greatest hits," said Dan.

"There is some _good_ disco out there, thank you very much," said Arin.

"You're entitled to your wrong opinion," said Dan. 

"Suck my dick," said Arin.

Dan made an annoyed noise, and he turned off the sound capture.

"Can you not flirt with me so... blatantly when we're on the mics, please?" Dan looked... downright annoyed, which was unexpected. 

Usually he rolled with the punches. 

The heck?

"We've always flirted with each other," Arin said. "The Lovelies eat that shit up with a spoon."

"Well, maybe things are a bit different now," said Dan. 

"What, since we're dating?"

"Yeah," said Dan. "I mean... I like you. A lot. I really do." He was blushing, looking down at his hands. "But, like... the Lovelies are getting really... pushy about my personal life, and I don't know if I have it in me to deal with all of that just now."

"You flirt with Suzy when you're on videos with her," Arin pointed out.

His... feelings were hurt.

What the hell?

Why was he having this reaction? Why was Dan having such a stick up his butt about this stuff?

Or maybe Arin was being a jerk himself. 

Did they have to act differently, now that the two of them were dating? It had been so _easy_ so far - Dan was his best friend, Dan was his boyfriend, his buddy, the person who he relied on as much as Suzy. 

"Yeah, but Suzy flirts with everyone."

"I flirt with everyone too," Arin pointed out.

"You really don't," said Dan. "You flirt with me."

"Well, ex _cuse_ me for flirting with my boyfriend," snapped Arin.

He was actually beginning to get mad. 

"I'm not asking you to stop flirting with me," said Dan. "I'm just asking that you're less goddamn blatant about it when we're actually on camera."

"I'm doing the same stuff I used to," Arin pointed out.

"Well, maybe you are," said Dan, "but people are picking up on the fact that it's not just a joke or something."

"I was never joking about it," said Arin, aware that he was getting huffy, not sure how to stop, or even if he wanted to .

"You could have fooled me," said Dan. "Anyway, you're not getting creepy AMAs asking about who you'd have gay sex with!"

"It's not like we're having any gay sex to begin with," Arin snapped.

"Excuse me?" Dan was crossing his arms, and now he was glaring. 

... shit.

Okay, no, Arin had stuck his foot in it. 

"I'm sorry," said Arin, and he cleared his throat, trying to get his feelings in the right order, and trying to make his brain make sense without losing his temper. 

"It's okay," said Dan. "Well, okay, no, it's not okay, but I appreciate your apology."

"Thanks," said Arin. "Can I get an apology for you dumping a bottle of water on my lap?"

"I dunno," said Dan, and he was grinning. "It's a good way of cooling your ardor, I think."

"You don't _usually_ want to cool my ardor," Arin said. "Anyway, why are you talking like that?"

"I've been rereading some of those old fantasy novels I used to love."

"Is that why you've been saying shit like "methinks"?" 

"Probably."

"But yeah," said Arin. "Can I get an apology?"

"I'm sorry for dumping water on you -"

"Thank you!"

"Even though you totally deserve it."

"You're being a dick," said Arin, but he was grinning. 

"Well, you like my dick, so there we go," said Dan.

Arin leaned in to kiss Dan, and Dan didn't pull back - he stayed in place, and they kissed each other.

Everything was okay.

... no, everything wasn't okay, but it was okay for now, and that was good enough for Arin.

"Ready?"

"Ready."

Arin turned the capture on again, and they both settled back into their spots. 

"Welcome back to Game Grumps," said Dan. "Arin wet his pants."

"You wet my pants," Arin countered.

"When you say it like this," said Dan, "you make it sound like I, like, took out my dick and pissed all over you."

"Dan," Arin said, in a fake conspiratorial voice, "don't let the Lovelies know what we're doing on our off time!"

"So I shouldn't tell them about the hot blowies and the weird thing you did with your tongue?" 

Dan glanced sidelong at Arin, and he waggled his eyebrows, grinning.

"Dan," Arin said, in a scolding tone of voice, "if you tell everyone about that, all the Lovelies are gonna want me to do it for _them_ , and we can't have that, can we?"

"I don't think Suzy would appreciate it," said Dan. "You know. Your wife, who you pledged to be with forever and love for all time."

"Those weren't my actual vows," Arin pointed out. 

"I know," said Dan. "I was there. I'm just like... paraphrasing."

"But I'd get a sore jaw, if I was doing all this shit for every lovely."

"So you're worried about the soreness of your jaw, but not breaking the sacred bonds of marriage?" Dan's voice went scandalized. 

"Fuck you, Dan," Arin said, and he tried to keep his voice affectionate, although his own hackles were starting to go up.

It had been a long day, and Arin was on edge.

"Oh my god, Arin, look at that guy. His head is under his butt!" 

It was the most blatant subject change this side of anywhere, but Arin jumped on it.

"This is kinda proof that there's no such thing as intelligent design," said Arin. "Because, like... what if you accidentally shit yourself? You'd get it all over your hair - or even your mouth. Like... one person human centipede."

"Urgh," said Dan, as the character wandered around the weird landscape, surrounded by equally weird looking denizens. 

"Okay," said Arin, "but what if, like, what if we're part of some kind of like... we're in one of those games like Spore or the Sims or something, and _we're_ designed by some super bored kid."

"There was a Star Trek episode kinda like that," said Dan. "And a Futurama episode riffing on the Star Trek episode."

"What, that we're all actually just simulations."

"No, Arin," said Dan, in a condescending tone of voice, "that was the Matrix."

"I know what the Matrix was about," Arin said. 

"The Star Trek thing was more about, like... people being... like, actual action figures, kinda?"

"That's a kink thing, you know," said Arin, looking sidelong at Dan.

"What, Star Trek?"

"Well, yeah," said Arin. "But also people who get off on the idea of being, like, a living action figure or something like that."

"Well, I think that it's true," said Dan. 

"Think what is true?"

"That we're some kind of... badly designed something or other. Because our fun bits are so close to the gross bits."

"What do you mean?" 

"We go to the bathroom from the same spot that we emit sperm," said Dan. "That can't be well planned out."

"What, we should, like, shoot our goo out of our mouths or something?" 

Arin began to laugh, belly laugh, as Dan ran headlong into a battle that he was in no way prepared for.

"It'd be like the fucking... Exorcist," said Dan, and then he screamed, because something jumped out at him and bit his character's head. "Fuck!"

"Next time on Game Grumps," said Arin, "we're gonna go into the _deep_ questions. Like why we pee!"

* * * 

"You wanna come over tonight? Suzy made enchiladas, we can heat them up, maybe watch an episode of something, make out on the couch?"

Arin tried to keep his tone light, glib.

He wanted some company.

Suzy hadn't been feeling well, but she wasn't sick enough to actually be fussed over. She just wanted to sleep. 

"I think I need some solo time," said Dan. "I've been at you guyses house a ton of times this week."

"You guyses?" Arin snickered. "You sound like you're coming from some kinda gangster movie."

"Well, this wannabe gangster is gonna go home and veg out," said Dan. 

He kissed Arin, and he made his way out, shrugging on his leather jacket, then shoving his hands in his pockets as he made his way out to his car. 

Arin tried not to pout, tried not to be too grumpy as he made his way to his own car.

* * * 

Arin ate his enchiladas by himself in the dark kitchen, petting Mochi gently with his foot.

His pants were still wet, which was just... so awkward, uncomfortable, making everything sticky. 

He was kinda mad at Dan about that, but... well, he did kinda deserve it, sorta.

Dan could have been a bit less physical with it, at least.

Arin sighed, and he glared down at his dinner. 

Stupid Dan, being reasonable about his boundaries and not wanting to deal with invasive personal questions from their admittedly very nosy fans.

* * * 

He went to bed, to find Suzy sitting up, fiddling with her phone.

"Hi," said Suzy, and she smiled at him. "How are you?"

"I'm okay," said Arin. "Got into a bit of a... something or other with Dan."

"He told me," Suzy said, indicating her phone. 

"Oh. Dan's talkin' to you?"

"Yeah," Suzy said. "Why wouldn't he?"

"He, uh... he mentioned he wanted some alone time," said Arin.

He kicked his wet pants off, and pulled his shirt off.

He glanced sidelong at Suzy - she usually gave him a nice, lecherous look when he got naked.

She had her eyes on her phone.

Arin bit back a sigh.

"So, uh, is Dan doing okay?" 

"Yeah, he's doing great," said Suzy. "He wants to take me on a date this weekend."

"Could I tag along?" 

"Actually...." Suzy bit her lip, looking sheepish. "Would it be okay if we went one on one?"

"... sure," said Arin. "You guys getting tired of me?"

He tried to make his nervous laugh sound fake. 

"Oh, no," said Suzy. "But we haven't had, like, a chance to have one on ones as of late, since we all three got together."

"Oh," said Arin. "I've been enjoying it being the three of us."

"Oh, I have too," said Suzy. "But it'd be kinda nice to have some one on one time with Dan, since you and I have so much of it most of the time, you know?"

"Yeah," said Arin, although he wasn't seeing it. "I'm gonna go shower."

"Have fun," Suzy called, cheerful. 

* * * 

Arin took a shower, washing the sweat out of his hair, off of his... well, everything.

He wanted some company.

Why was he so clingy lately?

Maybe because he'd been so busy lately, and stressed out.

Maybe he was just becoming adjusted to having someone around him _all_ the time, which was doing his happy little extrovert self good.

And now here he was, suddenly booted out.

What if Suzy and Dan wanted each other more than they wanted him?

Arin sighed, pressing his forehead against the cool tiles.

No, that wasn't it.

He and Dan had been doing a lot of late nights lately, not even for the fun reasons (although there had been fun reasons after they'd finished the shit they needed to do, but it was late as hell). 

Suzy had been working hard as well, and when the three of them had hung out, they'd fallen into the habit of cuddling up on the couch, versus fucking around. 

He was tired.

Maybe, if Suzy was up for anything fun, they could have some fun one on one time, like she said. 

He hadn't eaten her out in almost two weeks - he could remedy that.

His cock was firming up, and he glanced down at it.

That would work.

He'd eat her out, maybe he'd give Dan a good blowie to make up for the whole bullshit with all of the bad jokes, and shit would be fine.

* * *

Arin came into the bedroom, dripping wet, to find Suzy dead asleep, her phone next to her face.

It was buzzing next to her, and Arin picked it up to plug it in, and caught a glimpse of her texts. 

They were all from Dan. 

A bolt of annoyance went through him, and he clenched his teeth as he plugged in her phone.

... what the fuck?

Maybe he was just testy from all the over work.

With a sigh, he climbed into bed and turned out the light.

He lay on his side, the curve of her spine pressed against his own back, and he tried not to think of the bad mood he was in.

* * *

He woke up to an empty bed, and a note from Suzy. 

_Headed out early - gonna help Holly with her new project. xxx_

She had left a lipstick kiss on the paper, right by his name, and he smiled. 

Aww. 

She did love him.

He was just being insecure and an asshole.

He was lucky that she put up with him. 

With a happy sigh, he stood up, his back arching, crackling like someone tap dancing over a bag of potato chips. 

* * * 

He was still in a good mood when he got into the Grump Space.

"Hey Ross," said Arin, and Ross didn't look up from his tablet.

He was in the zone.

Dan was sprawled out on the couch, and he was grinning down at his phone, a fond expression on his face.

A little stab of jealousy shot through Arin, and he tried to ignore it.

He was probably talking to Suzy.

He liked the two of them together - it was sexy, it was... it was nice, two of his favorite people, together, and they even shared their togetherness with him. 

He sighed, and he went to go fiddle with various things that he needed to do, to get this episode put together. 

* * * 

“So, uh… you excited for your date this weekend?” 

Arin kept his voice casual, as they both got stuff ready.

“It should be nice,” said Dan. 

“What are you guys planning?”

“Dunno yet,” said Dan. “Probably going to go to a movie, then get dinner. Maybe go back to my place.”

“Sounds nice,” said Arin, and he tried not to let jealousy color his voice. 

“You got any plans for the weekend?”

“Nah,” said Arin. “Going to, uh, enjoy some time to myself.” He laughed. “Lots of masturbation, farting without shame.”

“You fart without shame anyway,” said Dan.

“On that note - welcome to Game Grumps!”

“I was just mentioning that Arin has no shame,” said Dan.

“I have plenty of shame,” Arin argued. “I just have shame about… weird stuff.”

“I’d say you’re pretty shameless,” said Dan. “You do walk around naked a lot.”

“Why’d you have to tell them that I’m naked right now?” Arin put on a stage whisper.

“I’m sorry,” Arin said, “is my big, erect weiner distracting you from this… riveting gameplay?”

He grabbed his dick, and he squeezed it. 

It didn’t need the encouragement, frankly - it had been a bit since he and Dan had been intimate - since he and _Suzy_ had been intimate. 

Dan gave him a Look, one eyebrow going up. 

Arin gave him a Look back. 

“You’re always sitting here with a boner,” Dan said. “I’ve learned how to tune it out by now.”

“You can’t tune out a boner,” said Arin. “They don’t make noise.” Then he grinned. “Although wouldn’t it be funny if they did?”

“What?”

“If dicks made noise.”

“I feel like we’ve had this conversation,” said Dan, and then he was swearing, because something was lunging at his face, and they got a bit lost in the game, because things were happening, and Arin was shouting encouragement. 

When things calmed down, Arin came back to the talk. 

“What if, like, everyone’s dick made its own individual noise, every time they got hard?”

“You’d be at, like, a fuckin’ strip club or something,” said Dan, going along with it, “where girls are doing their thing, and all around you, there’s all these fucking… stupid cartoon sound effects.”

Arin stuck his finger in his mouth and made it “pop”, cackling. 

“Hear that, Dan? It’s time for hot blowies!”

“You having a boner doesn’t mean that I’m going to give you a hot blowie,” Dan said, and he was still laughing, as the horse on screen ran off towards the distant hills. 

“So I have to have other reasons for you to give me a hot blowie?” Arin’s tone was teasing.

Dan gave him another look.

Arin smiled at him, fluttering his eyelashes.

“It’s been awhile,” Arin said. “Since you and I, you know, exchanged Cinnabon recipes.”

“That’s because my Cinnabon recipes are so good that you don’t need new ones,” said Dan. 

“What kinda noise would your dick make?”

“The chorus of “Take On Me,” obviously,” said Dan. 

“Not Rush?”

“Nah, that’d be too expected,” said Dan. “My dick has a few secrets.”

“What do I gotta do to learn those dick secrets?”

“It’s all Indiana Jones,” said Dan. 

“Which one?”

“One of the good ones, duh,” said Dan. 

“Well, obviously,” said Arin. “Your dick is only in the best taste.”

“The very _best_ taste!”

“I bet it tastes good, too,” said Arin.

“Arin,” said Dan, “does your wife ever ask you about all of your weird homoerotic urges?”

… ouch.

That was a bit of a kick in the gut. 

“If you put any effort into it, I don’t think she’d be able to resist you, either,” he fired back.

He saw Dan’s jaw clench.

Okay, maybe he was thinking too hard about this, or maybe aiming a bit… low. 

“So what do you think they were smoking when they designed these things?”

“I dunno,” said Dan. “When I was on all the… various, exciting drugs that were a part of my rakish youth -”

“Rakish now?”

“Totally rakish. But they never really got me doing much of anything creative. There was a lot of lying in bed and staring at things, or lying in bed and jerking off, or doing nothing but playing Morrowind.” 

“So drugs don’t make you more creative?”

“I think it depends on who it is,” said Dan. “I think that if you were the type to do those kinds of drugs, I could see you doing creative stuff. Probably weird creative stuff.”

“Who’s done good creative stuff?”

“That one artist you like, the one who does the animal saints and the weird podcast, she did a good thing on weed. It was a toad.”

“She would do a toad.”

“Well, not do-do a toad.”

“Ew!”

“... how would that even work?”

“New subject!” Dan sang out.

Arin burst out laughing. 

* * * 

It was later.

Much later. 

Late enough that everyone else was gone, and Dan had his feet on Arin’s feet.

“I think… I think the people who designed these levels were sadists,” Dan said, into the microphone.

His character was running in circles, after falling into a fire pit.

Again. 

“What kinda sadist? Like Ross? These are less sadistic than those bullshit levels Ross made on Mario Maker, ages ago.”

“No, this is too fucking… _boring_ to be sadistic like Ross. At least with Ross, it was… exciting.”

“You must really hate this game,” Arin said, and he was snickering. “Considering how much you hate Ross’s games.” 

“I don’t hate all of Ross’s games,” said Dan. “There were some good ones.”

Arin was rubbing Dan’s feet.

He was doing it absently, except that Dan was turning red, biting his lip. 

“Yeah? Like the weird Pac Man one?”

“Yeah, something like that.”

Arin pulled on Dan’s toe, and it cracked.

“Dude,” said Arin, “you need to stretch more, if your joints crack that much.”

“Isn’t cracking unrelated to the amount of exercise you get?” 

“I’m not sure,” Arin said. 

“Next time on Game Grumps,” said Dan, “we can figure this shit out.”

He turned off the mic.

Arin leaned over, turning his own mic off. 

“Christ, that was a marathon,” said Dan. 

“You said it,” said Arin. “Anything I can do to… cheer you up?” 

“I’m sure I could think of a few things,” Dan said, and he was grinning. 

“How about a hot blowie?”

“What is it with you and my dick today?”

“You’re wrong there,” said Arin, and he shifted, so that he was leaning between Dan’s legs, his hands on Dan’s thin thighs.

One of Dan’s feet was resting on the floor now. 

"How am I wrong?" Dan put one hand on top of Arin's head, sifting through the silkiness to gently knead at Arin's scalp. 

"Well," said Arin, "I'm like this about your dick _every_ day. Maybe you just haven't been paying attention."

Dan snorted. 

"You're being extra pushy today," he told Arin, trying to open his pants one handed.

Arin pushed his hands away, undoing Dan's jeans himself, and he shoved them down around Dan's thighs. 

Dan wasn't hard yet, but his dick was beginning to firm up.

Dan looked down at Arin, an eyebrow raised, as Arin squirmed to get more comfortable, nuzzling into his thigh, wrapping his hand around Dan's shaft and squeezing it. 

"Maybe I've missed your dick," Arin said. "Didja think of that?"

"You see me all the time," Dan pointed out. "My dick is part of me, so logically, you see my dick all the time."

"It doesn't count as "seeing" your dick if I can't really interact with it," said Arin. "Like... you know when you're a kid, and you're all "Can I see your bike", and then your rode it around the block a few times?"

"I seem to remember that," said Dan. "So you wanna take Excalibur for a spin?"

He was reclining like some kind of Roman god, and Arin's heart was possibly going to overflow, from how gorgeous he was, from how... everything it all was.

Here he was, on the couch at his very own office, at his very own business, and he was about to interact with a truly glorious cock.

That truly glorious cock twitched in his hand, and he smiled at Dan, licking his lips.

"You ready for the hottest of blowies?"

"I feel like you'd have to be drinking something hot for it to be the hottest of blowies," said Dan.

His skin was breaking into goosebumps, and Arin ran his hands along Dan's thighs, feeling the muscles trembling under his hands.

There was a power to this, a power that made him a lot more horny than he had any right to be, all things considered.

Was it a power play thing?

Or was it just because of the fact that Dan was so beautiful that Arin was just... speechless.

Who fucking cared, at this moment.

"This is going to be the _figuratively_ hottest blowie ever," said Arin, and then he took the head of Dan's cock into his mouth, sucking on it gently. 

Dan groaned, and his hips rocked forward, his fingers tangling in Arin's hair. 

"Fuck," Dan sighed. "This is... a pretty hot blowie."

Arin didn't try to say "I told you so," because it's rude to talk with your mouth full, but he sure as fuck thought it, and he was practically snickering as he took down more of Dan's cock, until the head was right up against his throat, and his nose was pressed against Dan's belly.

"Oh, fuck," Dan groaned, and he rolled his hips forward. "Oh... fuck...."

Arin wanted to say something about Dan's lack of vocabulary, or whatever it was that he was doing with Arin's hair, but he still had his mouth full, and he was beginning to bob his head, slurping, drool gathering under his chin, his hands on Dan's thighs, holding them open.

They were tensing, flexing under Arin's hands, and Dan's toes were curling against Arin's sides.

Arin came off, gagging a bit, and then went back down for more, reaching down to fondle Dan's balls.

Dan groaned, a heartfelt sort of sound, and Arin was smirking, moving to Dan's perineum, pressing down on it gently.

Dan's cock pulsed in his mouth, and Arin moved his finger a little further back, just brushing at Dan's hole.

Dan froze.

"Um, Ar?" 

"Mmm?" 

Arin pulled off of Dan's cock, giving him a concerned look. 

"You alright?"

"Yeah, I'm alright," said Dan. "But, uh... no butt stuff, please?"

"Right, sorry," said Arin, sheepish. "I'm kinda running on what I like when I get a blow job. I'm sorry."

"It's okay," said Dan.

Excalibur hadn't wilted in the least. 

Arin went back down, beginning to suck on him harder, gently scraping his teeth along Dan's length, rasping his tongue along the underside.

He sucked, concentrating on Dan's circumcision scar, then the one spot, right on the underside, that made Dan shudder like he was in pain.

"Oh my god," Dan mumbled, and Arin took in more of his cock, as much of it was he could, until his lips were amongst the curly hair at the base of Dan's cock, and Dan was thrusting gently, almost imperceptibly.

"I'm gonna cum," he told Arin. "Can I cum down your throat? Please? Swallow my load baby, _please_." 

Arin gave an awkward thumbs up, and began to suck harder, bobbing his head, so that it wasn't all down his throat.

He slurped up more of Dan's cock, cradling Dan's balls, then squeezing them, gently, just enough to make Dan sob and squirm. 

Dan came. 

He came in Arin's mouth, and okay, it was pretty damn gross, but it was... exciting, in a weird way. 

Arin swallowed it down, just like he said he would, and he licked his lips and made vague "yum" noises, just to heard Dan laugh and moan at the same time, as Arin sucked on his cock, sucked him dry.

"Fuck," Dan gasped out. 

"You keep saying that," said Arin, pulling off and wiping his mouth on the back of his hand. 

That was... a lot of cum. 

"Pardon me for losing some of my creativity when I'm having my soul sucked out via my dick." 

"You sing about dicks for a living. I figured you'd be able to keep up your well known creativity while you're being... stimulated," said Arin, and he waggled his eyebrows.

Dan snorted.

"When you say it like that, you make it sound like you're sticking a cattle prod up my ass," said Arin.

"... why would I stick a cattle prod up your butt?"

"It's a thing they do with cows," said Dan. "They do this thing where they stick an electro shock thingy up their butts, to make them ejaculate when they're trying to collect semen."

"Would that work with human beings?"

"I have no idea," said Dan. "I don't really want to find out."

"You're not even the least bit curious?"

"If I want to just cum like a firehose, I can hold off jerking off for like... two months," said Dan.

"You'd never last that long," said Arin, sitting back. 

"I took that Tantric class and went months without jerking it," Dan said, pushing his dick back into his pants.

Arin leaned against the arm of the couch, and he squeezed his own cock, which was hard and throbbing, leaving a wet spot in his boxers. 

"How did you not die?"

"I played a lot of bass," Dan said, and he laughed.

"So, uh... you wanna help me out with this?" Arin indicated his own cock. 

"I certainly wouldn't mind," said Dan, and he was smirking. "What would you like?"

"A blowjob for a blowjob?"

"See, _that_ is the kind of Hammurabi code I can get behind," said Dan, and he was getting on the floor, right in front of Arin, and he was shoving Arin's pants down. 

"But then wouldn't we be in, like, an infinite circle of blowjobs? Oh, fuck, _yeah_...."

Dan wasn't the most skilled at blowjobs - he still wasn't sure what to do with his teeth, and his gag reflex was strong enough that he couldn't take that much into his mouth, but still.

He took what he did get like a champ, though, sucking on the head of Arin's cock, swirling his tongue along the slit, slurping up and down along the length of it.

Arin groaned, his hands going to Dan's hair, burying his fingers in it and tugging on it, just gently enough to make Dan moan around his cock. 

Now that was a nice sensation, and he did it again, just to feel it, which made Dan more enthusiastic, if more sloppy. 

Dan was clumsily jerking Arin's cock with his free hand, beginning to bob his head in time with the pumping of his fist, and Arin's eyes were rolling into the back of his head, because... what Dan lacked in talent, he more than made up for in enthusiasm. 

Arin came quickly - he hadn't had anyone else on his dick in about a week, and he was shuddering as he came, Dan pulling off and coughing, groping around for a tissue, then spitting out his mouthful of spooge.

"You need to eat more pineapple," Dan told Arin, and he nuzzled his cheek into Arin's thigh.

Arin rolled his eyes.

"You sound like Suzy," he told Dan.

"I mean, who else would be sucking your dick?" Dan used a new tissue to wipe his mouth up. 

"I dunno," Arin teased. "Maybe I wanted to go on an adventure and go off to find someone new to wrap their lips around the brontosaurus."

"You know the brontosaurus was never a real dinosaur?" Dan took a swig of water. 

"Yeah, but my dick still looks like one," said Arin. 

"You've got fans who'd be willing to do that, you know," Dan said, unexpectedly. 

"Hm?"

"Fans. We've got a ton of fans who'd probably happily suck your dick."

"Well, yeah," said Arin. "But that'd be... weird."

"You think?"

"Yeah," said Arin. "Anyway, I wouldn't want to have to, like, check IDs. I only fuck people I really care about."

"Fair enough," Dan said, and he stretched. "I just think it might be good for you. You know, to try being more... adventurous." 

"You saying you want me to go stepping out?" 

"Maybe?"

Something uncomfortable was beginning to form in his belly, like a small ball of hot aluminium. 

"Do you not like me just being with you and Suzy?"

"I don't... dislike it," said Dan, and it looked like he was choosing his words very carefully. "But I sometimes think that maybe you, like... depend on us too much?"

Arin's blood went cold.

"I see," he said. "How long... how long have you felt like that?"

"Oh, shit, no, dude, shit," said Dan, and he actually took Arin's face in his big hands, pressing his forehead against Arin's. "No, that's not what I meant."

"So what did you mean?"

"Just that... well, Suzy is your _wife_ , and that's intense, and I'm your first dude and also your first boyfriend _and_ your best friend, which is equally intense, and sometimes you get... well, really intense about it."

"You used ‘intense’ too many times in that sentence," said Arin, because his mind was trying to grasp on to something other than the rising panic in his gut.

"Sorry," said Dan. "And it's not a bad thing, I promise, it's just kinda... you know?"

"Right," said Arin, through numb lips. "We should probably start getting ready to head off."

"You're right," said Dan. "You want to get some food or something?"

"Nah," said Arin. "I'm tired. I think I just wanna go home to sleep."

He made a big show of yawning and rubbing his eyes. 

"You're not too bothered by what I said, are you?" Dan was looking at Arin, his expression worried. "I mean... there's nothing _wrong_ with being super intense. I just... need a bit of a break sometimes, you know?"

"Oh, absolutely," said Arin.

He was full on cringing inside.

It was like being an over-eager teenager all over again, saying exactly the wrong words, at the right time, being nothing but awkward elbows and knees, always putting his feet in it. 

He needed some time to himself, to brood a bit on this, maybe figure out where he was going wrong.

* * * 

Suzy was asleep when he got home, and he was half tempted to wake her up and ask for some company.

But no, she deserved her rest.

Mimi was rubbing against his ankles and meowing, and he leaned down at picked her up, kissing the top of her head and pressing his hot face into her soft fur.

"Hi," he said to her quietly. "You don't think I'm too intense, do you?"

She meowed.

"Thank you, sweetheart," he said, and he kissed her head again, cuddling her to his chest.

She purred, snuggling into him, and he relaxed back into the chair, slowly, his feet up on the coffee table.

So maybe he had been... over enthusiastic as of late. 

It was true - he was happier than he'd been in a very long time, and he wanted to spend all of his time with them, because... well, they were his people.

But maybe he was just too overwhelming. 

Suzy had never found him overwhelming, but maybe, now that she had someone else here, she was seeing what it was like to date someone who was more... normal.

Was he too weird?

Arin sighed, and he stroked down Mimi's back.

"You're a very stupid cat," he told Mimi, "but I'm a very stupid man, so it all works out." 

"I don't think you’re stupid," said Suzy, from the doorway.

Arin jumped, upsetting the cat - he rubbed her back and kissed her head again.

"I thought you were asleep," he said, looking over his shoulder at her. 

"I was," said Suzy. "I noticed you hadn't come to bed yet."

"Yeah, sorry," said Arin. "My head is... kind of a mess."

"What's up in your head?"

She moved to sit next to him, flopping on the couch, resting her head on his shoulder.

"Just... had a conversation with Dan," Arin said. 

"Are you... bothered by me and him doing a thing together, without you?"

"No, no," said Arin.

_A little bit_.

"Are you sure?"

"... I'll be okay," said Arin, and he sighed. "Just some... growing pains, or something like that."

"What did you and Dan talk about?"

Arin took a deep breath.

"Do you think I'm too... intense?"

"What do you mean?"

Mochi had joined them, sitting in Suzy's lap and rubbing his head against her chin.

"Like... I dunno. Too clingy. Too intense. Moving the relationship too fast?"

"Babe, it's kinda late in the game to worry about that," Suzy chuckled sleepily. 

"Well, okay, not, like... our relationship," said Arin, and he wrapped an arm around her shoulders, pulling her closer, his nose pressed into her hair.

She smelled like herself, like home. 

"No?"

"Like... the relationship we've got with Dan. Which is sort of a new relationship, right? The way me and you and Dan are all dating, and me and Dan are kinda dating, and we're all... kinda confused about all of this." 

"Confused?"

"Kinda, yeah," said Arin. "I mean... I don't wanna just act like I'm still friends with Dan. We're dating. I suck his dick, stuff like that. But he told me that I'm too intense lately, and he said he, like, needed a break, from the three of us hanging out together." 

"That doesn't mean he's tired of you," Suzy pointed out. "He might just be overwhelmed. I mean, how long has Dan been single, before we got together?"

"... I hadn't thought of that," said Arin, sheepish. 

"Dan't not used to having a partner, since it's been ages since he dated someone seriously," said Suzy. "He's also never dated a guy before. Let alone a guy who is also his coworker and his best friend."

"Oh god," groaned Arin, and he flopped back, covering his face with both hands. "I'm the biggest jerk this side of... anywhere." 

"You're not that much of a jerk," said Suzy.

"That much of a jerk?"

"You're being a bit of a jerk," said Suzy.

"Aren't you supposed to be on my side?"

"I am on your side," said Suzy. "Part of being on your side is telling you when you're being a jerk."

Arin poked her gently in the side. 

"Shut up with your logic," he mumbled. 

"Are you worried that me and Dan are gonna run off to have a torrid love affair or something?"

"... sorta?" He shrugged. "I don't like... feeling ignored. I don't want to be ignored. I want to be important enough to spend time with, or to go on dates with."

"You _are_ that person, but sometimes we all need company with someone else, you know?" 

"I guess," said Arin. "I'd like to be with you guys all the time, if possible."

"Dan's an introvert," Suzy pointed out. "So am I."

Arin groaned.

"Maybe I should just get another date person or something."

"Hmm?" Suzy eyed him. "That came out of left field. I thought you were only interested in me and Dan."

"I mean... Dan was the one who suggested it," Arin said, slightly defensive. "He said it might do me some good to step out, as he put it." 

"... huh," said Suzy. "Not sure how I feel about that."

"What do you mean?"

"Well," said Suzy, "currently the two of us are dating the same person, so it's not like you're dating someone else. But if you got someone else... I dunno, I might feel kinda... you know. Left out."

"What, like how I'm feeling left out by the fact that you're going on a date with Dan without me?" 

"That's different," Suzy insisted. 

"How is it different?"

"Because I know Dan," said Suzy, "and he's not just yours. He's ours."

"So you don't want anything with me that you can't share with me?"

"I don't mean it like _that_ ”, said Suzy, and she was sitting up straight now.

"So what did you mean it as?"

"Just that... I don't like the idea of you with someone else," Suzy said. 

"So just Dan?"

"Just Dan."

"We are in an open relationship," Arin pointed out. "And when you and Dan got together, I didn't throw this kinda thing."

"Well, no, but he's also your best friend. It's different."

"What, so I can go date someone we know? Should I start hitting on Holly?"

"I don't know," Suzy snapped. "I'm just weirded out, okay?" 

"So I'm being a jerk when I'm weirded out, but you're not?"

"You weren't being a jerk by being weirded out," Suzy said. "You were being a jerk - you _are_ being a jerk by being clingy."

"Fine," said Arin. "Well, maybe you're being a jerk with your clinginess.”

"I'm not being clingy," said Suzy. "I'm just expressing my anxiety."

"Your anxiety that I'm gonna be with someone else," said Arin.

"I'm going to bed," said Suzy. "We're not getting anywhere with this conversation."

"I dunno," said Arin. "I think we got somewhere. You can't stand the thought of me being with someone else!"

"All of this because I want to spend an evening with my boyfriend!" Suzy stood up, still holding the cat. 

"And apparently you're allowed to want to spend the evening with your boyfriend, but god forbid I go on a date with someone you haven't approved of first!"

He wasn't shouting, which was the important part.

He was being emphatic, but he wasn't yelling.

"That's _different_ ," she insisted.

"Tell me how."

"It's late," said Suzy, "and I'm going to bed."

"You won't -"

"I'm going to bed, Arin," said Suzy. "We can talk about this in the morning."

Arin... Arin wanted to say a lot of things, but he bit his lip, and he sat back on the couch. 

He'd deal with this bullshit in the morning.

* * *

Suzy was still at home when he woke up on the couch, and she looked... something.

She was sitting at the kitchen table. 

"I was a jerk," said Suzy.

"You kinda were," said Arin. 

"I'm sorry," said Suzy, and she sighed, leaning back in her chair. 

There was a hot cup of coffee in front of her. 

"So I wasn't being fair last night," Suzy said. "It was late."

"It was," said Arin, and he sat down across from her, his hands folded on the wood of the table. 

"I'm... I'm nervous about you going out to meet other people who I don't know," said Suzy. "The idea of you going out with someone I don't know... I don't know. It just makes me really anxious. It makes me feel out of the loop."

Arin shrugged.

"I mean, I wouldn't date anyone who wouldn't want to meet you," he pointed out. "I don't even know if I'd want to date someone else. I just want... you know, the option."

"You do have two partners already," said Suzy. 

"I do," said Arin, "but you guys want to have one on one time together, and maybe I... maybe I want a chance to do something new and exciting with some _one_ new and exciting."

He paused. 

That wasn't true, exactly.

"Or maybe... I kinda just like the idea of having something to myself. The way you and me kinda share Dan, except it feels like you sometimes don't wanna share him, which is fair, but I feel like I'm not allowed to feel like that."

"What do you mean?"

"I worry that I'm... leaving you out, if I go out and do stuff with Dan, other than us screwing around at work, or something like that. Since I hate being left out so much, I wanted to make sure that you never were." 

"I don't work that way," Suzy pointed out.

"Well, yeah," said Arin, "and now that it's the cold light of the morning I can kinda remember that."

"I'm sorry," said Suzy. "I haven't been fair."

"We haven't been, either of us," said Arin. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay," said Suzy. "Do you wanna try to work this out?"

"Well, obviously," said Arin. "I don't want to be a jerk about it." 

"So," said Suzy, "you feel left out when me and Dan do stuff one on one."

"Kinda," said Arin, "but at the same time, like...." Arin put his hands behind his head, leaning back into his chair. "I feel like I'm gonna get in the way of your relationship with Dan, but I'm worried that your relationship with Dan will usurp our relationship."

"Arin," Suzy pointed out, "we're married."

"Yeah," said Arin, "but I don't wanna be the boring hubby you come home to, after having sexy rock star dates with Dan."

"I could say the same thing," Suzy pointed out. "You guys do fun stuff together all the time, and I'm kinda just the boring wife back home."

"You're never boring," said Arin. "I promise."

"Well, I don't think you're boring either," said Suzy. "Okay?"

"Okay."

"Are we okay?"

"We're okay."

"And if you want to go on a date with someone... can I meet them?" 

"Maybe we should deal with that when it comes," said Arin. "I dunno. That doesn't entirely feel fair to whoever I'd be dating. But," he said hurriedly, as Suzy's face did... something, "we can worry about that later. Right now it's just you and me and Dan, and sometimes that'll be you and Dan, and that's okay." He paused. "Although would you be bothered if I took him out for a date next weekend, maybe? If he's free?"

"That sounds like fun," said Suzy. "Fully endorse it."

"Awesome," said Arin, and the weight that had been sitting on his chest lifted somewhat. 

Things were gonna be okay. 

* * *

"Hey, Dan?"

"What's up?"

Dan was sprawled out on the couch, his feet up on the table in front of the couch. 

"Let's go on a date next weekend."

"What kinda date?"

"I dunno," said Arin. "We could go to a movie? Maybe fuck around a bit at your apartment?"

"You don't think we fuck around enough here?" 

"I mean," said Arin, "it's fun to fuck around here, but I'd like to do it on a bed. We're gonna end up leaving some kind of weird stain on this couch, I just know it."

"As if this couch doesn't have enough stains," said Dan, and he looked amused. "But I dunno. Maybe."

Arin's stomach dropped.

"Maybe?"

"I might wanna just have some time to myself," said Dan. "You know? Like I said, I've been spending all of my time with you and Suzy, or else I'm working on shit with Brian, or with Ross, so it might be nice to have a weekend to myself to just, like, loaf around be a potato."

"You'd be the skinniest potato ever," said Arin, recovering somewhat. "You'd practically be a french fry already."

“How _do_ they make french fries? Do they, like, make them with the skin on?”

“I’m honestly not sure,” said Arin. “I’ve never, like, worked in food processing or whatnot.”

“When you say you’ve never worked in food processing, it makes it sound like you were a food processor in a previous life, or something like that.”

“Can you do that? Reincarnate from being a thing to a person?”

“I don’t know, man.”

“Anyway, how long have food processors been a thing?”

“I don’t really know,” Arin said. “I should look this up.”

Dan snorted. 

“Ready to start the episode?”

“How about a smooch for luck?”

Dan was grinning, and he leaned in, kissing Arin, slow and deep.

Arin pulled back, breathing heavily, and he smiled. 

Then Dan turned the sound capture on, and Arin clicked on the television.

“Welcome to Game Grumps,” said Dan. “And once again, Arin has a boner.”

“I can’t help it,” said Arin, putting a bit of a whine into his voice. “You’re just so pretty.” 

“I’m not that pretty,” said Dan. 

“You’re totally pretty,” said Arin. “You know we’ve got enough fans who think so.”

“Our fans do have excellent taste,” Arin allowed. “Since they’re watching us.”

“Because fart jokes are the height of good taste, aren’t they?”

“They totally are,” said Arin. “I wouldn’t make them otherwise. I have the absolute _best_ taste, and you know it.”

“Are you so sure?” 

“You’ve eaten what I’ve cooked,” Arin pointed out. 

“What’s that got to do with your horrible sense of humor?”

Arin prodded him in the side. 

“You know what I mean,” said Arin. “So where were we?”

“I think we were fighting the weirdos with the giant horns that look like dicks,” said Dan.

“Everything in that shape looks like a dick,” said Arin.

“Not _everything_ looks like a dick,” said Dan. 

“Oh yeah? Name one long, cylindrical thing that _doesn’t_ look like a dick!” 

“Um… well, okay, you got me there,” said Dan. “Is there an opposite to that?”

“Things that look like pussy?”

“Yeah, things that look like pussy.” 

“What is something that looks like pussy?”

“Mangos,” said Dan. “And cantaloupe.”

“Didn’t you fuck a cantaloupe?” 

Arin navigated around a rock in game, and then tried to jump past another giant behorned… something or other. 

“That was a movie reference,” Dan said, defensive.

“Well,” said Arin, putting a teasing tone on, “I bet you’re gonna fuck more than a cantaloupe this weekend.”

“Yeah,” said Dan, giving him a look.

“You should totally let me blow you,” said Arin, and Dan started laughing. 

“Dude,” said Dan, “you’re so pushy. Oh my god.”

“I’m sorry,” said Arin. “Wanna talk about something else?” 

“Let’s talk about something else.”

“So Suzy made me watch this ridiculous movie the other day,” said Arin. “It was a horror movie.”

‘I thought you hated horror movies.”

“I don,” said Arin. “But sometimes I’ll go along with it for her, since I know she likes it so much.”

“What kinda movie was it?” 

“It was about this weird… farmer type guy, he was burying people up to their necks, doing some… stuff to their vocal cords.” Arin shuddered, and he held on to his own throat. 

“Yeah? Sounds horrible. Whoa, dude, that thing is just about to… yeah, he just stepped on you.”

“Great,” said Arin flatly. “I’m jelly.”

“I’d say you’re jam,” said Dan. 

“A jammy-jam,” said Arin, and Dan smiled at him, like the sun. 

Arin’s heart opened up like a flower, and he smiled, at Dan.

“What’s the difference, between jam and jelly?”

“One of ‘em has bits in it,” said Dan.

“Bits?”

“Like, seeds, stuff like that.”

“We should look that up,” said Arin. 

“Nothing is stopping you,” Dan said. “You do have the whole of the internet, right here at your fingertips!”

Arin googled, and he laughed, and he was content, for the moment. 

* * * 

“There’s this thing I read about,” Dan said, when they were chilling out on their lunch break. 

“Yeah? What’d you read about?”

“This polyamory thing. It’s called compersion. Where you feel good because your partner is feeling good.”

“Huh,” said Arin. “Like when the three of us are… you know, fucking around or whatever?”

“Nah, it’s different than that,” said Dan. “Because you’re, like, directly involved in that, right?” 

Arin nodded, slowly.

“This is when, like, you and your partner are going off to do a different thing, and you’re not a part of it, but you’re still kinda… happy that your partner is happy?”

“Yeah, I think I get it,” said Arin.

“Do you get that?” Dan was looking at him contemplatively.

“... sure,” said Arin, although he wasn’t sure it was true.

He didn’t like to be left out, and this seemed to be one of those situations where he was supposed to feel one way, but he felt another.

Why couldn’t this stuff be easy, like it had been at the beginning?

None of it was working. 

Urgh. 

He’d talk to Suzy and Dan about it. 

But afterwards, because he didn’t want to ruin their date. 

So he’d have a night to himself.

He’d done those tons of times. He could totally do it. 

It was just… harder.

Well, it wasn’t tonight.

Tonight, he had his lovely wife, and they could cuddle and possibly do things that were more than cuddling.

Did conflict make him horny? 

Urgh.

He went to the bathroom, washing his face with cold water, and he sighed. 

Okay. 

He could do this.

* * * 

“I’m sorry I’ve been so weird lately,” Arin said, awkwardly, as the two of them gathered up their various bits and pieces to head home. 

“Hm?”

“Weird. I’ve been kinda… weird lately,” said Arin. “Just been feeling kinda… insecure lately.”

“Insecure?”

“Yeah,” said Arin. “Because we haven’t had a one on one date in ages. And I’m all… you know, you and Suzy are doing a one on one thing, and I still feel kinda like… when you guys are… I mean….” Arin made a frustrated noise, and bonked his head on the wall behind him. “I’m fucking this all up.”

“You’re not,” said Dan. “I promise.”

He took Arin’s hands, and he squeezed them.

“I need some alone time,” he told Arin, keeping eye contact. “I like you, I promise. I just wanna recharge for a bit. Meditate, not wear pants, just do my own thing.”

“I understand,” Arin said, and he was beginning to.

Just… gaah.

“I’ve never been with a dude before,” Arin said. 

“Neither have I,” said Dan. 

He kissed Arin, gently, a bit nervously, and they pressed closer, forehead to forehead, hands on each other’s hips. 

Dan held on to Arin’s lower back, and Arin held on to Dan’s belt loops.

It was a steamy kiss, full of tongue and panting, and when they pulled apart to breathe, Dan’s eyes were steamy. 

“I like you,” Dan said, and he sounded a bit loopy. 

“I like you too,” said Arin. “A lot.”

“I’m glad,” said Dan. “I’m really, really glad.”

Another kiss that left Arin panting, desperate. 

Then Dan pulled back, and he was smirking, ever so slightly. 

“How about… how about you save that for later?”

“Later?”

“Yeah,” said Dan. “How about we go on a date… next Wednesday?”

“I thought you wanted alone time,” Arin said, startled.

“Yeah. On the weekend. I’m totally fine with hanging out with you on a day when we’re not doing a super late night.”

“... oh,” said Arin, and he blushed. 

“Thanks.”

“No worries,” said Dan, and he kissed Arin again. 

* * * 

He came home to Suzy watching a sitcom on television, wrapped in a blanket, a cat on her lap.

“Hi, sweetie,” she said, looking at him upside down.

“Hey babes,” said Arin, and he flopped down onto the couch next to her, reaching out for her.

She cuddled up to him, her head on his chest, and he rubbed her back. 

“It’s been a long day,” she said, and she sighed, a full body sigh that left her utterly boneless against him. 

“What happened?”

“... kinda been realizing what a jerk I was,” Suzy admitted. “And also I messed up this super expensive butterfly, and I’m gonna have to order more of them, and I feel stupid.”

“I’m sorry,” said Arin, and he kissed the top of her head.

“It’s alright,” said Suzy, and she turned her face up to be kissed. “Cheer me up.”

“Anything you’d like in particular?”

“I kinda just wanna sit in your lap and make out with you,” said Suzy. “Is that okay?”

“That sounds fuckin’ _excellent_ ,” said Arin, and he reached for her.

* * * 

Suzy was warm and soft in his lap, a familiar weight.

She was wearing a hoodie, and her skin was extra warm to the touch. 

It was all so… familiar.

In a weird way, it could have been any time - they could have been eighteen again, or newlyweds, or last week.

But it was _now_ , and she was rolling her hips, the plushness of her ass soft against his erection.

She moaned into his mouth, tugging on his hair, her tongue sliding along his, and his hands were on her sides, under the hoodie.

He pulled back, and he grabbed the hem of the hoodie, pulling it up and over her head. 

She wasn’t wearing anything under it, and he buried his face between her breasts, mouthing along the curve of one, then nibbling along the top, all the way to the top of it, moving forwards, towards her nipple, kissing it delicately, then licking it gently. 

“Oh,” said Suzy, and she lolled her head back, breathing heavily. “Oh, fuck, Ar….”

“I’m getting to it,” Arin murmured, right into her breast, and he sucked on the side of her breast, hard enough to leave a hickey, and she sobbed, pressing closer, yanking at his hair.

Arin pushed her breasts together, held them in his hands, and he kissed across her nipples, loud, sloppy kisses that made her whimper and giggle at the same time. 

“You are _so_ ridiculous,” Suzy mumbled, and she ground back against him, pressing her knees into his hips.

“You looooove it,” sing-songed Arin, and he did it again, sliding his tongue out to lap at each of her nipples.

She was panting, giggling, humping against him, and his cock was hard through his pajama pants, and right up against her vulva.

“You’re really into this, aren’t you?” She teased. 

“I dunno,” Arin said, and he let go of her breasts to grab at his ass, squeezing it with both hands. “Fuck, your ass….”

“You wanna fuck my ass? I’d say that’d take a little bit more of preparation,” said Suzy, and she kept grinding against him, panting, long, luxurious rolls of her hips. 

“I will fuck any part of you that wants fucking,” Arin said, his tone earnest.

“What if I wanted you to fuck my elbow?”

“... how would that even work?”

“I dunno,” said Suzy. “You’re horny enough that if anyone could figure out a way to do it, you could.”

“I’m not that horny,” Arin said, although he was holding her breast in one hand and her ass in another. 

“I remember the old days,” Suzy said. 

Arin snorted.

“We’ve got the added bonus of not having to worry about me creaming my pants in a minute,” said Arin, and his hand moved around to her front, cupping her between the legs. 

She sighed, grinding into his hand, and he chuckled, putting his hand into her yoga pants and squeezed her, his thumb against her clit, his middle finger along her slit. The tip of his middle finger slid into her, gently, just barely, and she was tight and desperate around him, twitching like she was electric shocked. 

He slid his finger in deeper, and she ground harder against him, panting open mouthed, almost sobbing. 

“You’re so… oh wow… oh…!” 

“Practice,” said Arin, and he curled his fingers, rubbing them against her g-spot.

She shuddered, her toes curling against his thigh. 

“Your fingers are amazing,” Suzy told him, her tone the height of seriousness, “but you know what’s even better?”

“My mouth?”

“No, even better than that.” 

She was doing something… undulating with her hips, and his finger was in as deep as it would go as she clenched around him. 

“Please,” Arin said, “enlighten me.”

“Your dick,” said Suzy, and she reached down between his legs, squeezing his dick. 

“Oh… that is indeed my dick,” Arin said, and he moaned as she slid his pants down, wrapping her hand around his cock, wetting her palm from his pre, then sliding along the shaft.

“I’m pretty fond of it,” said Arin. “I’d go so far as to say attached.”

“You’re such a dork,” mumbled Suzy, and she was kicking her pants off, her panties with it, and she was grinding the head of his cock against her clit. 

“It’s why you love me,” Arin said. 

“I dunno,” said Suzy, and she was guiding herself carefully onto his cock, so that the head of his cock was right against her entrance, then sliding into her, filling her up in one go. 

“Wow,” Suzy murmured, “that’s fucking… amazing.”

“It’s not… not the first time,” Arin said, but his hands were on Suzy’s hips, squeezing them, kneading the soft skin, as she squeezed him tight, her pussy hot and wet.

“Yeah, but you’re so… good.” She was riding him now, in earnest.

He rolled his hips, moving his hands to her breasts, to cradle and knead and squeeze them, thumbing her nipples.

“I d-d-do my best,” Arin said, and he chuckled in the back of his throat, bouncing her on his dick like the first time they’d done this. 

It was… it was exactly what he needed, after all the anxiety, all the uncertainty, it was perfect, hot and wet and tight, with her lovely, familiar face close to his, her forehead against his, her breath hot and plumy on his face.

“Suzy,” Arin mumbled, “Suzy, I love you. I love you, fuck, I… forever… I… fuck, fuck….”

He came. 

He came, deep inside of her, and he shuddered, fingers on her clit, rubbing as hard as he could, just the way he knew she liked, as her hips stuttered and she _squeezed_ him, her hips hunching forward as she was about to cum.

And then his dick slipped out.

Suzy burst out laughing - this had happened a few times, because of the way she tended to do things with her back when she was about to cum, and she was cumming, giggling and squirming.

He shoved two fingers into her, to give her something to clench around, and she sobbed as he pressed on her g-spot.

Her squirt dribbled down his wrist, from his palm, and she flopped forward, her face in his neck.

“Oh my god,” Suzy mumbled, and she was panting, nuzzling her face into his neck.

“You’re fucking amazing,” Arin said, and he kissed her neck, his lips against her pulse point. 

“So are you, you know,” said Suzy. 

“I do my best,” said Arin. 

* * * 

They went to sleep together, cuddled up together, his lips in her hair, his hands on her belly. 

He woke up before her, and he stared down at her, his heart as bright as a sun. 

She was… she was amazing.

She was everything he ever wanted, everything he ever _needed_ , and... he was going to love her for the rest of his life. 

As long as she would have him. 

He kissed her temple, and he was content. 

* * * 

“So I’m standing there, shirtless -”

“Remind me why you were shirtless?”

“This girl, she got hot sauce all over her chest, and she’d just gotten her nipples, like, tattooed, or maybe pierced, so it was just… pain, you know…”

“... you can tattoo your nipples?” 

Arin stared at Dan across the Grump couch, in a look of mingled shock and amusement. 

“Totally,” said Dan. “Although I wouldn’t recommend that to you, personally.”

His hand was on Arin’s leg, and he squeezed Arin’s knee.

Arin smiled at him, that same… tenderness filling him up, until he could barely speak. 

“Why?”

“Well, for one, I dunno if you could take the pain of that,” said Dan. “You’re not the best at pain.”

“I’m not that bad,” protested Arin. 

“Also, your nipples are, like, super sensitive as well,.”

Arin blushed, and he reached down to squeeze Dan’s fingers. 

Dan squeezed him back.

“How would you know that, hmm?”

“I mean,” said Dan, “you’re not exactly subtle about it.”

Arin cackled like a hyena.

“That is totally fair,” he allowed. “So what happened, while you were standing there topless?” 

“Well….”

* * * 

Arin was still cackling when they finished the episode, and they were leaning into each other, his head on Dan’s shoulder.

“How have you had such a weird life?” 

“I’ve done a lot of drugs,” Dan pointed out. “And I also just… did stuff, you know. I’m sure you’ve probably had some weird stories in your life.”

“My days in Disney were… something,” said Arin. “I just don’t know how many I can share, because I worry about getting sued. Anyway, your stories are better.”

“My stories are just more… mature,” said Dan. 

“My stories are plenty mature,” Arin argued. 

“Just without drugs and stuff like that,” said Dan.

“Winners don’t do drugs,” Arin said. “Which would _also_ explain your skill in video games.”

“Oh, I am _hurt_ ,” said Dan, and he put a hand over his heart and made dramatic death noises.

“Do you want me to kiss it and make it better?”

“Obviously,” said Dan, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. “How else do I deal with such an ego wounding?”

“Next time on Game Grumps,” Arin said, “I help Dan recover from that blow to his tiny penis - I mean ego!”

Dan was cackling as Arin turned off the sound capture. 

"You really think my penis is tiny?" Dan made his voice sound plaintive, sad.

"I do _not_ think your penis is tiny, I promise," said Arin.

"Maybe... maybe I should try showing you just how big it is," said Dan, in a slightly hesitant voice, but full of bravado. 

"You've showed me your dick isn't small before," Arin said, leaning back into the couch. 

"I dunno," said Dan. "Sometimes, I think the only way to tell if a dick is really that big is if you've got it inside of you, y'know? Just splitting you in half."

Arin paused, and he was blushing. 

His cock was swelling between his legs, making a tent in his pajama pants. 

"I've... had it in me," said Arin, and he cleared his throat. "I've sucked you off how many times now?"

"I meant in your butt, dumbass!" Dan leaned back, and he was cackling now. "I wanna fuck your ass!"

"FYI, I wanna F your A," said Arin, trying to keep his tone serious, then bursting out laughing as well. 

"Exactly," said Dan. "I didn't know that past me was just predicting our future sex life!"

"What, really?"

"I mean," said Dan, "I'm getting more comfortable with the idea of... you know, actually fucking you. Actually having sex with a dude."

"What, all those times that I've sucked you off don't count?"

"Blowies aren't sex," said Dan, making a dismissive gesture. 

"Seriously?"

"I mean, it's still another dude interacting with my dick, but like... I dunno, man." Dan shrugged. "It was a thing I wasn't sure I was okay with, but I'm starting to think about it at other times, that aren't just me jacking off."

"You jack off to thinking of me fucking you?"

"Of course I do," Dan said, as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Would you ever want me to... you know... fuck you, maybe?"

"... let me get used to having a finger in my butt first," said Dan.

"Does this mean that I can actually _put_ fingers in your butt?" 

"I guess it does," said Dan, and he laughed, sounding a little nervous, but mostly amused.

"So, uh... you ready for your hot date tomorrow?" 

Arin tried to crunch down the little bit of jealousy.

It wasn't as hard as he had thought it was. 

"Should be fun," said Dan. "You got anything fun planned?"

"I'm gonna order some gloriously gross food and watch some bad movies," said Arin. 

"That sounds like a pretty good evening," Dan said. 

"I want you guys to have fun," said Arin, and his voice was... okay, it was a little nervous, but hopefully he was getting what he was feeling across.

Even if he wasn't entirely sure what it was that he was feeling.

"Of course," Dan said. "I never doubted that." He reached a hand out, squeezing Arin's. 

"I'm sorry I've been so... blah lately," said Arin.

"It's okay," said Dan, and he laughed. "I think we're leaving the honeymoon phase of all of this, and are now actually getting used to the dating thing." He cleared his throat. "If it helps you feel any better, I've been feeling kinda weird too."

"What kinda weird?"

"The kinda weird where I keep worrying that I'm doing it wrong," said Dan. "Since... you know, I've been caring about my alone time, and I worry that makes me a bad partner."

"It doesn't make you a bad partner at all," Arin promised. "You're a great boyfriend. Best boyfriend I've ever had."

"Aren't I the only boyfriend you've ever had?" Dan's tone was teasing, slightly sardonic.

"Well, okay, yes, but that doesn't change the fact that you're awesome at it," said Arin. "I mean it."

He kissed the back of Dan's hand, and Dan blushed. 

Arin smiled at him, and the brightness in his chest got brighter, filling him up like he had swallowed the sun.

He'd been stupid about all of this stuff, and it was all going to be okay.

"We should get back to work," said Dan. 

"Yeah," said Arin, and he sighed. "Unless we left the capture on."

"I made sure we turned it off," said Dan. "Didn't want to worry about Matt or Ryan leaving that stuff in."

"They wouldn't," said Arin. 

"They might think it's funny," Dan pointed out.

"Yeah, but first they'd have to get over the shock over the fact that you and I are dating."

"The whole damn office knows that we're dating," said Dan.

"... maybe not everyone," said Arin.

"You're not subtle," said Dan, and he was smirking. "I know the way you watch my ass. Or my lack of ass, as it were."

"Ass ass it were," said Arin.

"I'm starting the episode," said Dan, but he was grinning as he flipped the switch.

"Welcome to Game Grumps," Arin said. "Dan doesn't appreciate my sense of humor."

"I totally appreciate your sense of humor," said Dan. "I just don't think that repeating the word "ass" actually makes it funny."

"Dude, you've literally made a career out of saying words like butts, and now you're trying to tell me that butts _aren't_ funny?"

"Butts are funnier than asses."

"Don't let the poor donkeys hear you say that. They might get sad."

"Real funny, Arin. Although have you ever noticed that donkeys have, like, the biggest eyes?"

"What, really?"

"Yeah. They've got, like, these huge liquid eyes. You stare into them and it's like your whole soul is reflected back, and your whole soul is telling you that you're not a very good person because you're never going to be as sweet and gentle as this donkey."

"Donkeys aren't gentle. Those things can _kick_ , dude."

"Well, I mean, you're super gentle and shit, but you could probably break me over your knee if you tried."

"Dan," Arin said, in his best silly voice, "are you trying to ask me to spank you?"

"... what?" Dan shot Arin a perplexed look. 

"You know. The whole 'you'll go over my knee if you're not careful' kinda thing?"

"I have literally never heard that," said Dan. 

"You don't watch enough porn," Arin said. 

"That is probably the only time someone is ever gonna say that to me," said Dan, and he was laughing. "But how about we just go back to our game, since that's what people are actually here to watch."

"You know they wanna hear us banter 'til the cows come home," said Arin.

"Well, yeah," said Dan, "but still." 

He grabbed for the controller. "So where am I going?"

"I think you need to follow that one dude...." 

* * * 

The night of the date arrived.

Suzy did herself up nice - her fancy make up, one of her nicer dresses. 

Arin watched her do it, and he did his best not to feel like crap.

Fuck it.

He was down.

He was down, but he’d be okay.

“So you’re staying out tonight?”

“Yeah,” said Suzy. “Probably gonna sleep at Dan’s place.”

“Well, uh,” said Arin, “have fun.”

“Thanks, baby,” said Suzy, and she stood on tiptoe to kiss him, getting lipstick on him. 

He smiled in spite of himself, and kissed her back.

“I’ll be back in the morning,” she promised him. 

“Don’t worry about me,” he said.

“Are you sure? You look kinda anxious.”

Arin tried to get his thoughts in order, staring off towards the ceiling and trying to get his thoughts in order.

“I’m gonna feel a little left out and a little lonely regardless,” he said finally. “I don’t want you to feel like you can’t go out and do fun stuff just because I’m feeling like that. Because I’ll be able to get over these feelings on my own, I just need a little time and space.”

Suzy nodded.

“I still feel kinda guilty,” she admitted.

“Well, you don’t have to,” he promised.

“You’re a good husband,” she said, and she kissed him again, leaving lipstick on his face.

He laughed, and patted her on the ass, because he could, then watched her walk out the door.

He tried to ignore the tightness in his chest, then gave up and picked up Mimi, burying his face into the soft fur of her back.

“I’m a horrible human being,” he told her.

She purred, rubbing her face against his. 

* * * 

Arin ordered pizza from that one place that Suzy hated, the extra greasy kind, with extra cheese, anchovies, and mushrooms. 

He ate it on the couch, watching old, bad anime from the nineties and guffawing his way through some of the really bad animation errors.

He was trying very hard to be okay. 

He wasn’t sure if he was succeeding or not, but in the very least, it was good pizza, and the cats were adorable as they tried to get in on some pizza action.

He got a video message from Suzy, around midnight, right when he was considering going to bed.

She was sitting in Dan’s lap, leaning back against him, and he was holding the phone up, with his long, ridiculous arms.

“Hey big cat,” said Dan, and he had his chin on her shoulder. “Wanted to say hi, and that we’re thinking of you.”

“I love you, baby,” said Suzy. “Can’t wait to see you tomorrow!”

… Arin didn’t know how he was feeling, but whatever weight that had been pressing down on his chest had… if not disappeared, at least gone down.

He sent Suzy a text back, with a heart emoji, and then he went to bed. 

* * * 

Arin woke up at ten in the morning to a text message from Suzy.

_Accidentally slept in, sorry! Wanna get brunch?_

Arin took an assessment of himself - he hadn’t cried last night, and he was still kinda… needy, but he could live with it. 

_Sounds good! Where?_

_Dan wants to go to that new pancake place_

_Send me the address. I’m gonna take a shower_

* * *

Suzy was wearing one of Arin’s shirts - it had the Sailor Senshi, all striking their various ridiculous poses. 

She seemed to be wearing his pants as well, and he raised an eyebrow when he sat down.

“Dan is in the bathroom,” she told him. 

“Gotcha,” said Arin. “Why are you wearing my clothes? Where did you _get_ my clothes?”

“Oh, this is just kinda… bits and pieces that you left over,” said Suzy. “I didn’t wanna wear my nice dress to brunch, since… it’s just brunch.”

“Right,” said Arin.

Suzy had a hickey on the side of her neck - she’d covered it with makeup, but he’d given her enough hickeys that he knew what to look for.

He braced himself for the flare of jealousy, and... nothing doing.

Huh. 

He thought of Suzy and Dan fucking, together, without him, and... still nothing.

… that was weird.

Not that he was going to complain. 

“Hey big cat,” said Dan, and he slid into his seat.

It was a small, round table, and Suzy was squeezed between Arin and Dan, her knees pressed against his. 

“Hi,” said Arin, shyness blooming.

… the heck?

“So Scuze says they have the absolute best pancakes here,” said Dan, and he was grabbing Arin’s hand under the table and squeezing it.

Suzy went for Arin’s other hand, and he interlaced their fingers. 

Arin smiled, bright enough to light up his whole face.

It was all going to be okay.

It was.

* * * 

And then it was Tuesday. 

Arin rubbed his hands together, trying to get comfortable on the couch, and then he cleared his throat.

“Something up?” Dan cast a worried glance at him. 

“I’m about to ask an awkward as hell question,” said Arin. 

“What’s up?”

“Do you still wanna try fucking me? Like, in the ass, I mean. Tomorrow.”

Dan blushed.

“It sounds like… it sounds like it’d be fun,” Dan allowed.

“Okay,” said Arin. “I just gotta do some… stuff.”

“What kinda stuff?”

“Well, to be blunt, I have to give myself an enema,” said Arin.

“Ew,” said Dan, but he was beginning to laugh. “Seriously?”

“Seriously,” said Arin, deadpan. “I want you to know how dedicated I am to you, that I’m going to stick a hose up my ass.” 

“When you put it like that, it sounds so damn appealing,” Dan said, his voice deadpan.

“My butt is _plenty_ appealing,” Arin retorted. “Especially after I’ve hosed it down.”

“Could you stop saying you’re hosing it down?” Dan wrinkled his nose. “It makes me think you’re gonna, like, stand in your backyard with a garden hose stuck up your butt.”

“... how big do you think my asshole is?” 

Arin tried to put genuine curiosity in his voice, before he broke down laughing again, harder this time, so hard that he had to put his elbows on his knees and his face in his hands, panting as he just kept laughing. 

“I don’t know how this stuff is done,” Dan said, defensive. “I’ve never had to do it myself!”

“Haven’t you had butt sex before?”

“Well, yeah, but it was more… spontaneous.” 

“What, you just stuck your dick in her butt in the heat of the moment?”

“Basically.”

Arin kept laughing. 

“You’re lucky you didn’t get, um… any surprises,” he said. 

“Ew,” said Dan. “That is, like, the most unsexy thing ever.”

“I’m sure I could think of something worse,” said Arin. “Just give me a minute.”

Dan turned on the mic. 

“Welcome to Game Grumps,” said Dan. “You Lovelies just saved my goddamn brain.”

“How do you know I won’t say it in front of the Lovelies?”

“Because you’ve got some self respect,” said Dan.

“I did a headstand and ate expired ketchup.”

“Would you call that you doing a headstand? You weren’t really holding yourself up, you were kinda just being held up.”

“Well, everyone could see my junk.” 

“They couldn’t see it. For all they knew, you had tied a water balloon to your dick and that was what flopped against your ugly ass pants.”

“We should talk about what we’re playing,” Arin said. 

“Oh, right,” said Dan. “So today….”

* * * 

And then it was Wednesday.

“You wanna come over in, like, two hours?”

Arin glanced at the clock on the wall as he put his sandals on.

“Yeah, sounds good. Gonna do your apartment up all nice for me and stuff?”

“Something like that,” said Dan. “And it gives you ample time for your no doubt vital butt cleaning.”

“If you had intestines like mine, you’d understand why it’s so vital,” said Arin.

“I dunno,” said Dan, and his voice sounded wistful. “Sometimes I wish that I could take a shit more than once a week.”

“How did our discussion of us going to do the do end up being about poop?”

“Every conversation with you devolves to talking about poop,” said Dan, in a resigned tone of voice. “I’ve just accepted it as a part of life at this point.”

“Like pooping,” said Arin, and he was snickering. “So it’s all come full circle, huh?”

“Oh my god, Arin,” said Dan, and he kissed Arin, kissed him soft and sweet and familiar.

Arin kissed him back, pressing into him, stubble rubbing against beard, his hands on Dan’s skinny hips.

“You’re giving me a boner,” Dan murmured against Arin’s lips.

“What doesn’t give you a boner?”

“I mean, you’re my totally hot boyfriend, and I am very shortly going to be putting my equally amazing dick into that glorious ass,” said Dan.

“That was a lot of nice adjectives,” Arin said, and he was blushing, resisting the urge to put his face in Dan’s neck. 

“I do my best,” said Dan. “Now, I do believe that I shall leave you to your various bowel clearing rituals, and I’m going to go hide all my dirty magazines.”

“You still have magazines, in this day and age?” Arin followed Dan to the elevator.

“Well, no,” said Dan. “I dunno? DVDs?”

“Even that’s kinda out of date,” said Arin. “Would it be Blurays now?”

“... I have no idea,” said Dan. “Although I have to say, I’m kinda amused by the fact that you seem to be caught up on the format of the porn, and not the fact that I’d hide it from you. 

“I figure it’s something weird like clown porn,” said Arin, in a dismissive tone of voice. “You can tell me about it some other time, when we’ve been together long enough for _me_ to get grey hair.”

He saw Dan falter at that, and was cursing internally.

Shit. 

He shouldn’t have said that.

But then Dan was calming down, and he smiled at Arin. 

“Maybe you’re right, and I am saving the _really_ weird shit for you.”

“I can’t wait to find out,” said Arin. 

He even meant it. 

* * * 

And then… well, Arin had to do some stuff.

Some rather unpleasant, slightly unhygienic stuff went down, that Arin didn’t want to think about too much.

He got a bunch of reading in. 

Then he took a shower, put on some nice clothes, and went downstairs.

Suzy had made a nest in the couch, wrapped in a kigurumi and a blanket, a cat on either side of her.

“Aren’t you overheating?” He leaned down to kiss her head, and she tilted it back, getting a bit of his beard against her cheek. 

“Nah, I’m okay,” she said.

“But you’re so _hot_ ,” Arin said, and he dodged out of the way of the poke to the side that she tried to give him.

“Have fun,” she told him.

“I plan to,” said Arin, and he kissed her again, and put his shoes on.

* * *

“Oh my god, you’re wearing actual pants,” said Dan, as soon as he opened the door.

“Why do you sound so surprised at that? I wear real pants sometimes.”

“Well, yeah,” said Dan, letting Arin in, “but usually it’s because we’ve got some sort of super important interview, not for me.”

“You’re plenty important,” Arin said, surprised. “Of course I’d wanna look nice for you!”

“Well, you always look nice for me,” said Dan.

“You say the sweetest things,” said Arin, and then he was kissing Dan, pushing him against his front door, his hands in Dan’s hair, his tongue in Dan’s mouth. 

Dan pressed closer, his hands on Arin’s back, clinging to Arin like it was a lifeline. 

It was the kind of kiss that they talk about in romance novels, and all Arin could think of was stupid romance novel cliches - too stupid to even justify with thinking of them, just kissing and kissing, drowning himself in the taste of Dan’s mouth, in the feel of Dan’s narrow chest and Dan’s big hands.

Goddamn it, he was falling into romance novel cliches anyway.

“Let’s go to bed,” Dan said thickly.

“You’re not gonna feed me first? Offer me a drink?”

“You don’t drink,” Dan pointed out, and his hips were rolling forward. “I’m gonna be really fucking honest and say that I want to be buried as deep in your ass as I can get, as soon as possible, because holy fuck, I am nervous.”

“I mean,” said Arin, “if you’re nervous, I don’t want you to feel like you have to do anything.”

“Nah, it’s not like that,” said Dan, as they made their way towards the bedroom. “So remember when you were a little kid, and you wanted to ride the biggest slide, but you were scared shitless once you got to the top?”

“I can remember that feeling,” said Arin. 

“It’s like that. I like… I really like this idea, but it’s a big plunge, you know?”

They were on Dan’s bed now, sprawling on the hugeness of it. 

“My ass isn’t that big,” said Arin, teasing. 

“I never said it was,” said Dan, and he straddled Arin, his knees pressing into Arin’s sides.

They were bony. 

And then they were kissing again, as hard as possible, yanking on each other’s hair, hips rolling, panting, and Dan was unbuttoning Arin’s shirt, pushing Arin down onto his back.

He was grabbing Arin’s chest, kneading at it, and he was pulling on Arin’s nipples, his flat ass pressing against Arin’s cock. 

“Oh,” said Dan, and he was rolling his hips, moaning, his head lolling back. 

“Oh?”

“Fuck, Arin,” Dan groaned, and then he kissed Arin again, and they were pressed together, skinny chest to skinny chest. 

“You’re so fucking gorgeous,” said Arin. “Holy fuck, how can… you’re… _fuck_.” 

“Fuck me,” Dan said. 

“What?” Arin paused, Dan’s words getting through the arousal that was fogging his brain.

“Fuck me.” 

“What do you mean?”

“I want to ride your dick,” said Dan, and he was laughing, almost hysterical.

“Uh, Dan?” Arin got himself up on his elbows, looking at Dan a bit nervously. “I mean, not to judge, but you don’t… you’ve never mentioned that you put stuff in your butt before.”

“I never have,” said Dan. “But… fuck….” He ground back against Arin, and Arin moaned, his hands on Dan’s skinny hips. 

“So you’ve never had anything in your butt before, and now you wanna get dicked down?” 

“Basically.”

“Um,” said Arin, and he licked his lips. “I mean this in the nicest way possible, but I don’t know if that’s the best idea.”

“I don’t care,” Dan said. “I wanna bottom. I want… I want you to be the first person to be in my butt. I’ve never had someone or something in my butt, I want you to put it in me. You’re my first boyfriend, you’re the first person I’d ever wanna do it with, and fuck it, I’m standing at the edge of the slide, and I’m gonna go down it.”

“... well, okay,” said Arin, carefully, slowly. “But we can stop whenever, okay? And… no matter what, we’re okay, okay?”

“Okay,” said Dan, and he laughed, clearly nervous. 

“Okay,” said Arin, and he took a deep breath, trying to get himself together. “Do you have gloves?”

“Gloves?”

“Yeah. Like, latex, or nonlatex gloves, some kind of gloves.”

“Yeah, why?”

“ _I’m_ the one who just irrigated their butt from here and back,” said Arin. “I don’t trust your butt.”

“My butt is trustable!”

“When was the last time you took a shit?”

“... recently, but I see your point. Let me get the gloves.”

* * * 

“Are you sure? You seemed awful excited to plow my ass.”

“I mean,” said Dan, watching nervously as Arin put on a glove and drizzled lube all over his fingers, “I’m not nervous about this. The way I was about that. I’m not getting the heebie jeebies, I”m just like… nervous, because I’ve never done this before.” 

“Are you _absolutely_ sure?” 

Dan was lying on his back, propped up by two pillows under his ass, a towel over the top of the pillows. 

“Arin, I’m sure. I’m fully consenting. Put your dick in my butt.”

“Well, first, I’m gonna put my fingers in your ass,” said Arin, and he was crouching between Dan’s legs. “And I’m gonna suck your cock while I do it, so it’s not too weird.”

“Can you hold off on the cock sucking until after your fingers are in me?”

“Sure, why?” Arin looked up at Dan, his brow furrowed. 

“I want to….” Dan looked embarrassed. 

“Hmm?”

“I’ve… I don’t have a super amount of new experiences these days, and I’d like to try them and know them when I get them.”

“... what?”

“I wanna feel it,” said Dan. 

“Oh,” said Arin. “Yeah, that makes sense.”

“I try to,” said Dan.

“Could’ve fooled me,” said Arin, as his lubed up fingers went towards Dan’s hole. 

Dan snorted. 

“I’m gonna put my fingertip in first, okay?”

“Gotcha.”

“You’ve _really_ never done this?”

“Never.”

* * * 

Dan took Arin’s fingertip.

He arched his back and made a surprised noise, biting his lip.

“This feels… I don’t know.”

“Do you like it?”

“I’m not sure yet.”

“Does that mean continue?”

“Yeah.”

* * * 

He took Arin’s finger, all the way in. 

A full finger, and Dan’s ass was hot, clenching, velvety.

“You digging around for treasure in there?” Dan’s voice was a bit tense.

“No,” Arin said, “I’m looking for that one spot.”

‘What spot?”

“You’ll know it when I find it.”

“Maybe I don’t have - _oh_!” 

Arin grinned - he was full on smirking. 

“Found it,” he said, in a teasing tone of voice. 

* * *

And then it was another finger, and another.

Arin was full on fucking Dan, and Dan was just taking it, moaning, humping up into Arin’s hand, moaning up to the ceiling, one hand twisting in his hair. 

“Fuck, Ar, oh my… fuck, it’s… it’s… it….”

Dan shuddered, his dick twitching, leaking more pre, almost crying as his toes curled against Arin’s thighs. 

When Dan caught his breath, Dan blinked at him, panting, skinny chest rising and falling.

“What the fuck just happened?”

“I think you just had a dry orgasm.” 

“A dry orgasm? What even is that?”

“It’s when your prostate is stimulated but you don’t, like… squirt.”

“... huh.”

“Do you want me to keep going?”

“Fuckin’ definitely,” said Dan. “There is no way I’m gonna puss out on my first butt fucking!”

“... only you,” said Arin. “But… okay. If you think you’re ready.”

“Isn’t it more important if you think I’m ready?”

“It’s your butt,” said Arin.

“But you know how to do this stuff,” said Dan. 

“Still,” said Arin. “It’s your body.”

“I mean, I guess i have to cop to that.”

* * * 

And then… then the head of Arin’s cock was sliding slowly into Dan’s ass.

Arin was wearing a condom, and the clenching heat around him wasn’t quite as… intense as it could be, but fuck it, he was… he was there, he was so good.

It was Dan’s face staring up at him, and he pressed his face into Dan’s chest, Dan’s bony ankles pressed against his shoulders.

“Are you… are you all the way in?” 

Dan was panting, his face turning bright red. 

“Halfway,” said Arin. 

“Can you put it all the way in?”

“Yeah, just… give me a… oh, fuck.”

And then Arin was all the way in. 

He was holding on to Dan’s thighs, and he was squeezing them, and he was just letting it sit there, as Dan’s cock began to go soft.

“Are you… not enjoying yourself?”

“No, fuck, it’s just all… weird. I… I like it, just, like… I don’t think my dick knows what to do.”

“No?”

“No,” said Dan. “it’s kinda… confused.”

“Lemme see if I can fix it,” said Arin. 

“It’s not broken,” Dan said, defensively. “Just… oh, fuck, do that thing again, please.”

Arin nudged his hips forward, and Dan clenched around him, squeezing him, and then he made a shocked noise, as Arin prodded at his prostate, carefully. 

“How’d you… how did you find that?” 

“I’m good at some things,” said Arin, and he laughed, awkwardly.

“You’ve done this before?”

“Nope,” said Arin. “I mean, I’ve… I’ve put my dick in Suzy’s butt. But it’s not the same. It’s a lot different.”

“You’re so good,” said Dan. “You’re so fucking good. Please… could you just… could you please fuck me?”

“I thought I was?” Arin leaned in, forcing himself in deeper, and he kissed Dan, awkwardly, to the best of his abilities. 

Dan was holding on to Arin’s hair, pulling it, and Arin was holding on to Dan’s hips, as he rolled his hips carefully. 

“Arin, you’re so big, Arin… please, can you fuck me?”

“I’m gonna keep fucking you, I promise,” Arin said.

Time went on.

Time just kept going on, it kept happening, and it didn’t _stop_ , until the two of them were pressed as tightly together as they could be, breathing each other’s breath, their chests rising and falling together.

Arin was shuddering, and Dan was beginning to twitch, his cock hard against Arin’s belly, and Arin reached down to squeeze Dan’s cock, beginning to jerk him off.

“Oh my god,” Dan groaned, and he arched upwards, his heels digging into Arin’s back (when had he moved his legs?), and then Dan was cumming, he was cumming so hard that he locked Arin in a vice grip, and Arin was cumming as well, because he didn’t have a goddamn choice.

He shuddered down to his toes, and he flopped forward, his face in Dan’s chest.

“You know,” Dan said thickly, “as lovely as this is, I can’t breathe.”

“Gimme a minute,” said Arin.

* * * 

They showered. 

Well, no, Dan ran to the bathroom and was… there for a while.

As it were.

Then they showered.

When they were on the couch, watching Aliens, Arin’s phone beeped.

“Oh my god,” said Dan, as Arin unlocked his phone. “You are _not_ missing this bit!”

“Gimme a sec,” said Arin.

It was from Suzy.

_Hope you’re having a good time, baby. I love you! Kiss Dan for me!_

And for the first time, he felt it.

Compersion. 

So it was real!

“Can I unpause the movie now?” Dan gave a belabored sigh. 

“In a sec,” said Arin, and he kissed Dan.

For himself, and for Suzy.

Because he was theirs, and they were his. 

And he was happy.

**Author's Note:**

> Like this fic? Check out my Tumblr, theseusinthemaze.tumblr.com!


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